007 Racing (PSX)

I remember Christmas 2000 well, waking up, immediately strolling out to the living room and seeing two CD shaped presents under the tree, knowing that I hadn't asked for any music that year, I knew that they were two PlayStation games. But which ones would it be? My mind was racing through all the options and when it came time to open them, I was ecstatic. Game #1 was Madden NFL 2001. Sweet! I had been playing NFL Game Day 98 for awhile now, it was time for a newer, better football experience. Game #2? 007 Racing! I was so excited, I'm a huge James Bond fan, so anything involving 007 was going to blow my 16 year old mind.

And boy did it! I was driving around in all of his classic cars, the BMW Z3, the Aston Martin DB5, the Lotus Espirit! I was shooting missiles at poorly designed cars and impossible to see specs that doubled as bad guys! I raced to my friend's house later that day and told him how awesome it all was, and how he had to check it out. He too was very impressed. Life was grand! If only I knew then, what I know now. This game sucks. Age can do that to you, numerous things I loved as a child, have turned out to be complete crap when looking at it as a man nearing his 30's.

So where did it all go wrong? It's hard to pin point, you'd probably have an easier time picking out what the game gets right. And.. well, it.. uh.. it has Jaws. And it's short. Really short. If you're any good (or you emulate with save states) you can breeze through the game in a matter of hours. And if you save state it, you might just save your sanity, as the game, like most of it's shitty ilk, is only challenging because nothing really works like it's supposed to. The cars all handle like their on grease covered roads, randomly swerving off the road with the slight turn of the wheel. There's no real difference between each car either, they all are stocked with the same Q technology. The Q tech all works well for the most part, minus a few that are mostly ruined by the horrible driving controls.

There's very little in the way of story. They attempt to have one, but it's just a few cut scenes with a creepy looking Pierce Brosnan CGI clone, and most of the story is told through narration by either M (someone doing a decent enough Judy Dench impression) and R (actually voiced by John Cleese!) You just go from mission to mission, with a basic explanation for why, and with little interest. Not to mention, there's no real “racing” in the game. There's two missions where you race against the clock and have to drive around a poorly designed New York City (without breaking!) with a bomb strapped to your car, gathering clocks that add to the timer. But ultimately these are the most frustrating parts of the whole game. The controls do nothing to help you out, you're constantly sliding all over the place and constantly stopping, which of course causes you to blow up. If any time this game causes you to lose your cool and break things nearby, it's these times. They're terrible.

I don't know what it is about him, but CGI Brosnan is kinda creepy. 

Is 007 racing worth playing? The answer is a resounding, NO! Not even a hardcore Bond fan will find anything enjoyable out of this game. Even if you can look past the awful controls, and boring game play.. there's just nothing in it that makes it worth any of your free time, even if it is relatively short. Skip it.